Thursday 3 July 2008

Reviews are Serious Business!

Welcome to Serious Business, reviews for those that take popular entertainment a little too seriously. Reviews for geeks that sweat the small stuff and notice the little details. I praise moments of brilliance in stuff that's usually dismissed as rubbish, and nitpick at little irritations in things that other people consider perfect classics.

It might be a box-office blockbuster or a groundbreaking game, but I widen every plot hole, expose every continuity flaw, shake my head at every over-used trope or cliché, and point and laugh at stuff that defies common sense.

I’m not merciless, however. Wherever possible I give the original creators the benefit of the doubt. I wrack my brains to try and come up with a theory that will justify or explain the problems – occasionally something odd can start to make sense if you put enough thought into it. But sometimes there’s just no hope.

You've probably heard the expression "It's easy to be a critic." Some people love to tear other people's hard work to shreds, but the truth is that they couldn't do any better. That's why I don't just point out the problems - I also suggest solutions. If a movie has a gaping plot hole, I will think of a way it could have been filled. A game gets tedious in the second half? I'll tell you how I would have spiced it up. The aim is to give constructive criticism so that others will not make the same mistakes!

If I review something and I can't think of anything I'd like to change about it... you know it's awesome through-and-through.

What inspired me to create this review site/blog? Well, I'm an aspiring games designer, and when playing some recent games I realised that I was not only judging the games on the basis of how much I enjoyed them, but also on whether I could have done better. I wasn't playing for fun anymore: playing games had become Serious Business. Minor annoyances became real irritations, because I was able to think up easy ways that those little problems could have been avoided altogether. The mentality started to affect the way I experienced other media too - I started coming up with alternative endings for movies, more convincing plot twists for long-running TV series. I was sure that the creators of these movies, TV series and games had themselves noticed these same problems, so there was only one possible answer - they just didn't care. They assumed the audience was dumb and wouldn't notice. Well, they were wrong. And I'm here to point out what they should have done.

First up, Command & Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars and its expansion Kane's Wrath. After that, TimeShift I think. Let me know of anything that you feel deserves my attention. Can be a game, movie, TV show, anime, novel, comic, whatever.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

That sounds pretty good! I'd suggest you punch a few holes into the Half Life 2 plot, and tell us why Gordon would rather shoot the place up than get with the girl.
Nice talking to you by the way!

Henry - Wilditch(hjrgarrett@gmail.com)

Anonymous said...

Something which may interest you, a forum of mine. :)

http://z4.invisionfree.com/srsbsns

your evil twin said...

Thanks for posting the first - and second! - comment on my blog. :)

I will indeed be getting around to Half-Life 2 at some point, and will have fun poking a few holes. Half-Life 2 does bear up to scrutiny reasonably well, though. I can tell you right now why Gordon shoots up the place rather than getting with the girl. The first couple of times you meet Alyx... well, you've only just met her, it's a bit early for that kind of thing. Plus you are surrounded by her friends. After that, every time you meet up with her is in the middle of a deadly combat situation. When does Gordon have an opportunity to take time out from shooting up the place?

Thanks for the link to your "Serious Business" forum! Though I am slightly confused by it... is the idea that people discuss current affairs? Cause the few debates are not debates in a very deep or serious way... or is that the joke, a forum called Serious Business where for once people on the internet do NOT take things too seriously. ;)

Anonymous said...

I really hope you'll review some of the retro games *looks at Arcanum longingly*.

Anyway, congratulations on your opening this site. I will bookmark it immediately.

Sig said...

Sweet! I was really hoping that someone would do something like this. I always hate it when reviewers don't review a game hard enough. I'm tired of seeing 10 out of tens, because no game is perfect.

The only problem is that I can't read your first review yet, because I havn't beaten the C&C series, and I don't want to ruin the story.